When your Soul is in Solitude; and you lost your Love without Lust by Aniket Kumar Das a.k.aStarrus Xanthis
Back in my childhood days; Rhythmic sways, I lost my ways; I remember those phase; Though I was free yet it felt like a cage; I want my rage to burst out, take a selfie with a rust pout; Want to shout, want to be an opportunist; Life seems like a zombie apocalypse; Maybe stay in dim, looking grim, but I was capable to win, my birth is not a sin; That’s why, Earth take in and I get in; You’re no one to decide, to choose my ride; I can guide myself for miles, speed dials me; I remember back, got beaten in a sack; Got a blind spot in my eye; I need an ice pack, still I can’t fill this lack; High stakes, eyes wide awake, wise takes; I need support for God sakes;
I took a tough course, was in turf wars, wasn’t dead source, I was a race horse; Solitude roads, I’ve to roar; These are not SARS, I got some lone-wolf scars; I wrote the last note before dying; This is my Soul, you’re reading, I’m underlying; That suppression, oppression, depression; Compel me to shut down the operation; “No, no, that’s not an operation that’s my…” Yes, I felt shy, now I don’t want to deny; Body dies, but Love can never die; Even God said, “Oh my my”; Ain’t ever got any chance, to romance, to dance or even enhance; Immense thoughts floored in my mind, flowed to my heart, showed up in my eyes; But it never came out, of my mouth;
Maybe I was not so prosperous; My heart was canny and courageous; I got a scratch on that, I need a stitch; Not the needle, I had to be rich; In brief, it was a grief, living dead on the street; Treated like a prick, situation was bleak; Attacks got a streak, attached to my reach; I use to be a coward crying ‘mayday’; Strive towards dying ‘heyday’; With my fate, got to laid with, I can’t switch, played with out of which, I died weeping like a witch, keeping high my pitch, cursing as if I was ditched; That’s so me, can’t you see, so mean, I can see, still racing away like a freak; Got no fear son, ain’t had a dear one, like an ugly cycle and gear none, Father don’t send me rear, I don’t want to live here, Nun;
This ‘bliss’, is just a word in dictionary; Supernumerary were the misery, I wasn’t free, causing bleed, want to pause this scene, demons are licking that red cream; Of course, it was worse, seems like a surge, hatred was purge, I want to grudge, but the evils got merged; I want everybody to know; What happened since the go; I am not the last in the row, many more to come, due to lass betrayal, kicking with the drum, got that so-called glow; I’m now a Soul, want to be a Ghoul; It’s not my goal, ain’t want to be ignored, like a stomach growl; Since start speeding solo, don’t want a duo, alive actually like a rolling stone, you can’t reach me, ’cause I’m gone; I can’t remember more tears aflow; Yes, I was dead 4 years ago;
By Aniket Kumar Das a.k.aStarrus Xanthis
Friends, he is a rapper and his poems are just speechless. You can follow him on Instagram and he has it’s Youtube channel. Click here to support him.
There will be coming, series of his heart wrenching and loving poems.
Stay Connected !
Click here to read poems at “Thought on my plate”. If you want to featured your poems in our site, you are heartily welcome . Visit here to submit your poem.
I stumble over door to door in search of salvation and mental peace. My own soul failed to recognise herself. The darker side of soul spread its branches ferociously. I feel like I was in prison in my own body like some amarbel find it’s host. After, millions steps and struggles; that loner Banyan tree amidst the cocophany streets piqued my curiosity. It feels like a gateway to heaven. Pendulum of hope started dancing over my chaotic mind. I sit beneath it’s warm blanket and smell it’s scents of petrichor. I feel myself alive again. Being in hands of mother nature, feels like a home : warm and divinely wrapped. A commitment to bequeathes everything finally headed towards ultimatum enlightenment. I forth to evolve, learn and grow from the the nature everyday and cherish it’s company!!!
You were my unfinished poem and you weren’t meant for the finished poem.
I used to love your company until or unless something inexplicable happened between Us. I don’t know what it was, maybe it was the ill-effect of the post-pandemic stress that everyone is feeling right now, in their day to day unoccupied occupied schedule.
Or it was when I wrote a poem ‘pretender’ for you. things changed over time. I never thought it was too fast to come by. I remember I wrote forever is a myth, nobody stays forever. everything is ephemeral… I guess, I smelled the fading absence of yours in nearby future.
You know, how I dare to write these by so boldly about you because I know you never read my writings and it easily swept away under your moled nose. you know, I have hated the fact that I loved you. But, just thinking about you keeps my never-changing decision changed. your thoughts remind me that *you were my unfinished poem* and you weren’t meant for the finished poem.
you are my source of inspiration. every little or less imagination arrives at *the last train to your heart.* and the best part is, it never instil itself to depart, until or unless I feel the feeling of being departure – the feeling of unrealistic togetherness.
Maybe we pretend like everything is the same between us, maybe everything is ephemeral and nobody stays forever. but the feelings I feel for you will always remain the same like the dried precious petals hidden in every next page of the never-ending book. reminding me of that – if one of those petals flew away with the winds; others shall remain and retain with myself.
P.S: it was a never-ending story. My heart wants to write more but I stopped it by doing so…
Every night, I fight my demon, so as to sleep peacefully. Yet, I change positions, Every time, I close my eyes, There’s some bustling, inside me.
He hijacks my brain. My own musings aren’t even mine I force myself to sleep, And fight the demon every night, So, he can’t control my mind.
Hundreds of sleepless nights are testimony of my aches, and voiceless screams. After the sacrifice and hours of efforts, Finally, sleep got victory over demon. That is only for a short period.
He reappears after hours, Waking me from deep slumber, Amidst the dark of midnight, This poem witnesses his reappearance, as my thoughts reels, Twenty past three, Thirty past three, Fifty past three.
Every night, I fight with the demon, So as to sleep peacefully, Immune to my ignorance, he still haunts me, But now is the time to fight back, Fight for my cause, to seek the depths, To raze under the blaze, And live a new life everyday.
My another site Zoobot where I post my study related stuffs.
She smiled, as the sun glanced on her face. After the hazy, tired, distressful night. She smiled, again.
The first rays of Sun is like a lagoon of overflowing HOPE to her. The scarlet hues of over rising sun, overcome the darkness by photons. that allowed her to get hypnotized by the horizon, in no time.
She glows like a radiance of full moon, In the light of the photons. Forgetting her scars for a while, praising her blemishes of life, and accepting her existence of living.
Looking at the sky, she stood arose, uplift herself with sac of positivity, looked outside the balcony, and smile 🙂 as if rays are flirting with her. She then, glanced to the Sun, whose rays by then, are playing with her curly frizzy hairs.
She widened her lips, eradicating all types of weeds from her life, and brought a blushing smile over her round face. Red rosy dimples on her cheeks, is the witnesses of her smile.
She thanked Universe for giving such a beautiful life to her. After all, she is a ‘ Helophilic ‘. How can she forget to adore the Sun, who adorn her life the best, out of waste.
Give me your valuable feedback and suggestions so I can improve my poetry :)) and do look at my latest poems .
Finally, I bloom, sigh... finally I flourished the way everyone wanted. I reached those endeavour, that you had expected. You must be glad by yourself? Or from myself? That I had fulfilled your desires. Finally, I transcends all of them, and attains all your expectations. You must be happy now ...right ? But, Do I listen to my inner self ? Or do my inner soul content with this conclusion? I know somewhere, This triumph will not last for decades.. May be it reflects the sense of external satisfaction. But, will not discover the wings of my internal satisfaction. I know, I will be regretting someday with my own forceful decision. I will rue those moment, when I had succeeded their expectations. And will soon passed away, in forlorn from this divinly fluke sphere, Like this yellow charming flower, Which looks enchanting from outside But later, will dried off as withered leaves. @dakshali.gupta (20/09/20)
Conclusion : Don’t just dream your life, live your dream ~ Bob bitchin